Hey Bill, can we get your very important scientific perspective on TOGEPIMET- that is, on the Togepi line?

Ah, yes, the togepi line. Quite a fascinating one, actually!

Togepi
The Spike Ball Pokémon
Type: Fairy
Official Registration #: 175
Entry: A foot-tall, egg-like pokémon that possesses very little in the way of offensive, defensive, or—for that matter—any battling abilities. In fact, it is said that shell of this egg-like pokémon stores joy and happiness and that this egg-like pokémon’s main ability is spreading peace and love wherever it goes. You are, in short, battling the most baby-like of all pokémon, and it would be most advisable to rethink your life decisions if you find yourself in this situation. You monster.

Togetic
The Happiness Pokémon
Type: Fairy/Flying
Official Registration #: 176
Entry: The evolved form of togepi, as a result of a heightened sense of happiness. True to its defined species, togetic is a small, bird-like creature best known for its ability to spread happiness and luck to kind-hearted people. Conversely, it grows depressed and lethargic when exposed to the arrogant, selfish, and immature for long periods of time. Thus, while togetic is traditionally considered to be a symbol of fortune and prosperity to the people of its native Johto, in more modern times, it has also become the symbol of people with questionable taste in men. Such as this writer’s older sister.

Togekiss
The Jubilee Pokémon
Type: Fairy/Flying
Official Registration #: 468
Entry: The evolved form of togetic, by exposure to shiny stone. A large, bird-like creature that flies from region to region on a pair of great, pure-white wings. It prefers to migrate to peaceful regions, to shower the people living there with blessings of prosperity and peace as a reward for their efforts to love and respect one another. However, if it crosses a war-torn country, it is known for spreading peace, happiness, and justice by delivering unto any authority figure it finds the most violent uses of Sweet Kiss and Fairy Wind observed in the pokémon kingdom. In short, this writer wholeheartedly approves of togekiss’s political platform and is more than ready to vote for togekiss in the next general election.