Hey Lanette, let’s have the most embarrassing story you’ve got about Bill. Whatever it is, I’m sure it deserves to be immortalized on the Internet.

I’m afraid I value my friendship with my partner too much to tell you his actual most embarrassing story, anonymous. Instead, you’ll have to be content with his second most embarrassing story.

Or at least the vague details about it, anyway.

Namely that he’s tried and failed to seduce the girl in the Goldenrod Flower Shop a grand total of thirty-nine times.

All thirty-nine of those attempts are individual embarrassing stories, so I can’t possibly choose just one.

For the record, I was not trying to seduce her. —Bill

Well, you weren’t actually seducing her, either. —LH