Hey bill, there’s rumors that your front yard is a famous date spot for local teens from cerulean city, some even say that gym leader misty was seen there with someone, have you noticed this or has it caused any problems for you?

I’ve noticed.

Much of the time, I really try to ignore the happy couples. Luckily, they tend to stay away from my home and garden, likely to avoid being watched, and those ones often quickly realize that the beach is full of krabby that are rather intolerant to any human who isn’t me. However, yes, there are a few instances now and then of bolder teens who seem to think I care about their exploits, and only then is it really a bother. (I’ve had to put a fence around said garden to safeguard my, er, collection of herbs. It and my venusaur have been highly effective of keeping trespassers off my property for the most part.)

Just about the only case I actually do look out for is Misty herself, partly to discourage her from advertising my front yard as a romantic getaway and partly because she has the absolute worst taste in men, and I frankly worry about her sometimes. (To make a very long story short, it’s made our friendship quite fascinating. We meet for coffee once a month to talk about men and complain about our respective sisters. All because I had my clefairy use Moonblast on a particularly terrible suitor.)