Tag: about the author

Bill, is your hair brown or green? I’ve seen you with both hair colors so I’m kind of confused.

Well, it’s certainly unusual to be asked personal questions. Not that I mind, of course.

My hair is naturally brown, but now and then, I like to dye it green. It’s currently dyed, should anyone be interested.

Should anyone also be interested, I dye it for personal reasons. Personal reasons that certainly do not have anything to do with the fact that people keep telling me I look exactly like my father when I don’t dye it. In case anyone was thinking that.

No one was, but now they are. Excellent job. —LH

What’s the story behind the giant slowpoke? And what was Bill supposed to be doing at the time?

Unfortunately, I can’t entirely say, anonymous.

Bill was supposed to be debugging the storage system. What he did instead was pull a giant slowpoke from what should have been an unused data bank (which he had no reason to check anyway). This just happened to be a giant slowpoke with the power to induce euphoric lethargy in certain humans when stared at for certain periods of time, and right when he really needed to be focusing on debugging the system to prepare it for Celio’s link-up with my part of the system, he stares at it. Because of course he would. —LH

To be fair, have you ever seen a finer slowpoke specimen in your life? —Bill

I feel like you’re missing the point. —LH

You’re just upset that I put it up for display in the Pokémon Cutting-Edge Technology Research Center’s Open House Day that one year and got more attention for it than those old poké ball prototypes from that one researcher you fancied. —Bill

I feel like you’re really missing the point. —LH

He wasn’t your type anyway. —Bill

Bill, you left Celio and me waiting for eight hours. —LH

Hi, I’ve just travelled to Johto from Hoenn with my Marshtomp. He never been left in a daycare before as he’s very nervous with strangers and I just wanted to know how trustworthy the daycare is near Golderod, especially when handling shy pokemon. I ask this as I may need to leave him there for a short while with my Linoone, who has been in a Hoenn daycare before. My friend’s (who I am currently staying with) Totodile is currently sick and I don’t want them to catch anything.

Having met them personally, I can tell you that they are absolutely trustworthy.

They’re a bit … eccentric when it comes to eggs (they have yet to train their ditto to leave their other pokémon alone, so they tend to stick passing trainers off with eggs now and then under the pretense that they have no idea how the egg came to be), but when it comes to pokémon care, you’ll find no one in Johto more trustworthy and caring, to be honest.

Well. Besides my mother, actually. But unfortunately, she’s not a licensed pokémon caretaker, so I’m afraid she won’t be available to care for your marshtomp.

Let me guess. You’re only mentioning her because she’s reading this, isn’t she? —LH

No, of course not. (Yes.) —Bill

Hey Bill, do you think you could make a list of the most psychoactive pokemon produced substances? I require this for, uh, research purposes for my, uh friend……

You know, I could actually respond to this, seeing as my answer would be purely for academic purposes, and in any case, it’s not as if I haven’t already made a few suggestions. Purely for science, of course.

On the other hand, my sensible, highly intelligent conscience tells me that perhaps in this particular case, offering any further information would be considered “enabling” and therefore “an ill-advised idea that could very well result in me being kicked out of the Symposium.”

Or investigated by law enforcement, which is what I actually said? —LH

Yes, thank you, conscience. —Bill

Any good nicknames suggestions for a female Numel/Camerupt?

As Bill’s long-time friend and close partner, I mean this with as much tact as possible. Bill’s aptitude with naming things is … not the greatest. As one can tell by the fact that he named his sea cottage the Sea Cottage. —LH

Oh, come now! That isn’t fair! If I put forth enough effort, I’m sure I can come up with something!

For example, what about … Flamey? Camely? Volcano? Sandy? Lumpy?

….

Actually, come to think of it, you may have a point, Lanette.

Excuse you, Candela is a queen and deserves the utmost respect and admiration. It’s only through her methodology that the full potential of fire, flying, fighting and dragon types can be brought to bear. Perhaps from the ivory tower of academia Team Valor’s approach may seem plebeian, but from a practical and experimental standpoint, there’s no better way to train and raise pokemon.

Oh yes, I quite agree; training is a necessary step in unlocking a pokémon’s full potential. It’s simply that I lack any and all aptitude with it, so while I understand it on an academic level and can speak at length about its effects on pokémon, I am less inclined to engage in training-based research.

Largely because I would be annihilated within three seconds of stepping on the field.

Especially if my opponent was Candela.