Tag: Alola

Mudbray and Mudsdale

Mudbray
The Donkey Pokémon
Type: Ground
Official Registration #: 749
Entry: Despite its short stature, this donkey-like specimen is a noted work pokémon, capable of pulling up to fifty times its own weight. However, it’s also infamous for being extremely stubborn, going as far as to refuse to walk for such offenses as being denied the ability to frolic in mud, being interrupted while eating, or simply being in the same general vicinity as a human. It is perhaps due to this stubbornness that humans have found it easier to hunt down or capture wild instances of mudbray, causing mudbray numbers to drop sharply to the point where they may only be found in Alola. Once it was discovered that mudbray was essentially eradicated from every other region on Earth, humans then began to consider the possibility that perhaps killing an entire species is a bad idea. Which, of course, is our species’ standard response to nearly eradicating anything, to be honest.

Mudsdale
The Draft Horse Pokémon
Type: Ground
Official Registration #: 750
Entry: The evolved form of mudbray, by battle experience. Unlike its preevolved form, mudsdale is not a pokémon with a predilection of frolicking, especially in the mud. Instead, it’s known for its steadfast, reserved, and highly driven nature, which, combined with its stamina and ability to carry literal tons of weight, make it the ideal work pokémon. However, it also highly dislikes water (going so far as to coat its entire body with water-repellant mud-like spit) and is intelligent enough to refuse commands if it considers them to be detrimental to either itself or its work. These behaviors are the source behind the popular Alolan phrase, “You can lead a mudsdale to water, but honestly, that would make you a terrible person.”

Mareanie and Toxapex

Mareanie
The Brutal Star Pokémon
Type: Water/Poison
Official Registration #: 747
Entry: A starfish-like pokémon native to tropical seas. It actively hunts corsola across wide swaths of territory on the ocean floor. If a trainer were to ask some pokémon ethologists, once it locates corsola prey, it simply harasses them until the corsola sheds its horns, which it then consumes. However, let it be known that the author is not one of those pokémon ethologists, and he would like to clarify to all his younger readers that, no, a mareanie rips apart its prey and feasts on the tender, fleshy organs of the main body. The horns that you see are indeed shed, but they’re “shed” in the sense that mareanie rip them off and let them float to the surface of the ocean.

Toxapex
The Brutal Star Pokémon
Type: Water/Poison
Official Registration #: 748
Entry: The evolved form of mareanie, by battle experience. Wild toxapex possess an extremely potent toxin that, while not lethal to humans, can induce a minimum of three days and three nights of excruciating pain. And even then, the entire ordeal leaves lingering effects on the human body. Fortunately, one would assume this means lingering pain or numbness, but in actuality, it just means one of the absolutely fantastic-looking scars that can possibly result from a pokémon encounter. The author may or may not know this from experience.

Crabrawler and Crabominable

Crabrawler
The Boxing Pokémon
Type: Fighting
Official Registration #: 739
Entry: Confusingly enough, although this coconut crab-like pokémon resembles krabby and corphish on a superficial level, it’s actually a fighting-type, not a water-type. While most researchers will tell you that it’s because its elemental weakness and resistance distribution resembles that of a pure fighting-type and not of a water or even water/fighting pokémon, seasoned pokémon ethologists will also offer the observation that crabrawler resembles a fighting-type in terms of behavior, including its technique of defending itself fiercely with its boxing glove-like claws, its willingness to train its physical traits by punching trees, and its zest for fighting literally anything and everything that crosses its path.

Crabominable
The Woolly Crab Pokémon
Type: Fighting/Ice
Official Registration #: 740
Entry: The evolved form of crabrawler, by battle experience, when trained in an exceptionally cold environment. The exact circumstances of this pokémon’s evolution have not only resulted in a significant boost in power but also in temper. Consequently, it will lash out at anything within reach, even going so far as to use its own claws as projectiles. To be fair, from what this author has observed, it’s not entirely unusual for someone native to a tropical island to respond to extreme cold with extreme anger.

I’m not so sure someone who doesn’t have much of a tolerance for heat should be commenting on someone else’s tolerance for cold. —LH

What? I can tolerate heat just fine. —Bill

You once described Fallarbor Town as “a nice little hamlet nestled on the slopes of Mount Doom.” —LH

Well, it is. —Bill

Stufful and Bewear

Stufful
The Flailing Pokémon
Type: Normal/Fighting
Official Registration #: 759
Entry: Although this pokémon strongly resembles a stuffed animal, humans should take caution in its presence. Even the smallest, youngest stufful is capable of knocking a pro wrestler flat on his back. This may sound like a rather specific comparison, but luckily, the research community actually has a handy subject for verification. Unfortunately, the author is not at liberty to say who, but let’s just say he’s in a prime position to study Alolan pokémon, and his wife has asked us all to humor him.

Bewear
The Strong Arm Pokémon
Type: Normal/Fighting
Official Registration #: 760
Entry: The evolved form of stufful, by battle experience. This red panda-like pokémon is famous for its unusual behavior, which is commonly studied by pokémon ethologists. While most pokémon smile and approach to interact with humans in a friendly manner, smiling, waving, and approaching are all signs of aggression in bewear. Signs of happiness, meanwhile, are often displayed in the form of curling up on the ground and crying, as these are the most prone and vulnerable positions for bewear to take. However, humans should take caution: just because a bewear is prone doesn’t necessarily mean it’s open for approach, and it can go from crying to breaking a human’s arm with a smile in a matter of seconds.

The Grubbin Line

Grubbin
The Larva Pokémon
Type: Bug
Official Registration #: 736
Entry: This small, larva-like pokémon lives underground in tropical regions, particularly wherever electric-type pokémon are found. It spends most of its life burrowing beneath the surface of the earth, coming close to emerging only when it feeds. During its feeding times, it will dig upwards until its long, strong pincers emerge from the earth to clamp down around a root so that its mouthparts can bite down and drink the sap from its target. Unfortunately, grubbin often have some level of difficulty telling the difference between a young tree and a being of equal weight and stature (specifically, humans), so trainers may wish to be cautious when traveling through known grubbin fields.

Charjabug
The Battery Pokémon
Type: Bug/Electric
Official Registration #: 737
Entry: The evolved form of grubbin, by battle experience. Like many pupa pokémon, charjabug is a largely immobile pokémon. It spends most of its time buried just beneath the surface of the earth in very close proximity to trees, which it will continue to feed on throughout the duration of this stage. The sap and detritus it consumes is then converted into electricity, which it stores as it prepares to evolve into its final form. Because it spends much of its time preparing for this evolution, charjabug is fairly easy to find and dig up. Once dug up, it’s an extremely handy to keep on hand, as one only has to give it one end of a USB cable to charge their pokégears and other devices. Of course, this is also an excellent way to lose a USB cable, as charjabug don’t always understand the difference between a wire and food, but at least by that point, your gear should be fully charged. Besides, what sort of unfortunate soul travels without backup cables these days?

Vikavolt
The Stag Beetle Pokémon
Type: Bug/Electric
Official Registration #: 738
Entry: The evolved form of charjabug, by battle experience when in an area rich with magnetic minerals. Like its cousin and natural rival pinsir, vikavolt possesses a pair of huge jaws, which it relies upon for its highly potent attacks. However, unlike pinsir, these jaws are primarily used to channel electricity into strong blasts, and as such, electricity is often seen arcing between these jaws, especially shortly before it attacks. Needless to say, either way, just like with its fellow beetle pokémon, it is a highly ill-advised idea to stick one’s hand between these jaws, even if it’s for science and the sake of measuring the exact voltage a vikavolt puts out. Just assume that the voltage is a relatively high number (because it certainly feels like such).

Wishiwashi

Wishiwashi
The Small Fry Pokémon
Type: Water
Official Registration #: 746
Entry: This sardine-like pokémon comes in two forms. The first form is a small, singular fish that’s weak, easy to catch, and goes great with rice and tomatoes. The second form, however, is actually an entire school that swarms around a single wishiwashi to form a giant, extremely powerful fish-shaped entity that not only wields a Water Gun that’s just as potent as a Hydro Pump but also is more than willing to turn this Water Gun onto any unsuspecting human who attempts to catch and eat the weaker examples of their species.

Bruxish

Bruxish
The Gnash Teeth Pokémon
Type: Water/Psychic
Official Registration #: 779
Entry: A large, filefish-like pokémon native to tropical reefs. This unique pokémon possesses not only formidable jaws but also potent psychic abilities. It is also, due to its habit of hiding half-buried in the ocean floor and its inherent viciousness, not an easy pokémon to find or overwhelm. It’s barely visible until one gets close, and by then, these victims are unfortunately within range of bruxish’s telekinesis. What follows afterwards is swift: the bruxish smashes its prey into the rocks via telekinesis, further stuns them by grinding its teeth, and proceeds to crush and eviscerate them via their strong jaws. However, if one can get past its swift hunting tactics—say, by distracting them with magikarp used as bait—then they’ll be delighted to know that bruxish are rather easy to catch, filet, and fry and, in fact, are Alolan delicacies for this exact reason.

Tapu KoKo entry please!

Why stop at just Tapu Koko?

Tapu Koko
The Land Spirit Pokémon
Type: Electric/Fairy
Official Registration #: 785
Entry: The guardian spirit of Alola’s Melemele Island. Supposedly the bravest of the four Alolan guardians, Tapu Koko is known for observing islanders and bestowing blessings upon worthy trainers. These trainers are then encouraged to undertake the island challenge, a type of journey specific to Alola, geared towards the training and selection of each element’s next kahuna. While Tapu Koko tends to be the most active tapu in selecting such individuals, it is also known for being the most capricious when it comes to deciding which among them actually becomes a kahuna. For this reason, trainers on Alola may start out on a journey to become strong enough to represent their island and elemental specialties, but they could very well find their lives veering off into an entirely different direction thanks to one of Tapu Koko’s sudden change of heart. Not that the author is complaining about such a process, of course. We did get Molayne out of such an arrangement. As well as a wealth of fantasy YA novels that seem to keep the editor happy.

Once again, Bill, I don’t judge you for your literary tastes. —LH

Tapu Lele
The Land Spirit Pokémon
Type: Psychic/Fairy
Official Registration #: 786
Entry: The guardian spirit of Alola’s Akala Island. It is said that this legendary pokémon scatters glittering scales as it moves and that these scales have the ability to restore one’s health upon physical contact. The latter is highly useful because as with all adorable, pink pokémon described on this blog, Tapu Lele is also infamous for being fantastically cruel and sadistic, and it’s both telepathic and capable of warping the fabric of space to create a strange and highly dangerous pocket dimension around its immediate area. In other words, you will very likely need these scales as Tapu Lele uses its psychic abilities to thoroughly destroy you.

Tapu Bulu
The Land Spirit Pokémon
Type: Grass/Fairy
Official Registration #: 787
Entry: The guardian spirit of Alola’s Ula’ula Island. Supposedly, this pokémon is extraordinarily lazy. Rather than attack an opponent head-on, it simply wills the vegetation around it to grow and ensnare the challenger before it delivers a devastating, close-range blow itself. Honestly, though, the author is intrigued by the fact that some people of Alola consider this to be evidence of Tapu Bulu’s laziness. If anything, it’s a brilliant strategy, and given how much effort the author has put into trying to will plants to do his bidding, he can safely say Tapu Bulu’s battle strategy is really much harder than it looks.

Not a good harvest, Bill? —LH

Oh, the garden was perfectly fine this year. It’s a certain half-plant, half-toad starter with a penchant for eating my crops after I explicitly tell him not to that’s the problem. —Bill

Tapu Fini
The Land Spirit Pokémon
Type: Water/Fairy
Official Registration #: 788
Entry: The guardian spirit of Alola’s Poni Island. This mysterious island guardian is supposedly the most laid-back of the four tapu. Unlike the others, who either actively seek out humans to observe (Tapu Koko) or toy with (Tapu Lele) or who actively avoid human contact altogether (Tapu Bulu), Tapu Fini prefers allowing humanity to do whatever it likes and will often only reveal itself to the truly worthy as a result. This may seem like Tapu Fini is putting in extra effort to avoid being detected, but in actuality, given the fact that her shrine is located in the highly unrelenting environment that is Poni Island, the fact that it surrounds itself with a dense fog full of danger, and the fact that the aforementioned shrine is called Ruins of Hope for a reason, it may be safe to say that Tapu Fini allows the environment to do much of the work when it comes to protecting her—much more than Tapu Bulu does, anyway.

Necrozma

Necrozma
The Prism Pokémon
Type: Psychic
Official Registration #: 800
Entry: Much confusion and debate surround this strange and highly destructive pokémon. For example, although it was first discovered emerging from deep underground beneath Alola’s Melemele Island, some say that Necrozma actually came from the Ultra Beasts’ world and is, thus, an Ultra Beast itself. Others argue that its emergence from Alola’s caverns is proof of a terrestrial origin and that its appearance and abilities are merely reflections of the Ultra Beasts—a defense, in other words, created by the tapu to counter the extradimensional threat. Then, of course, there are the more important questions, such as how a perfectly black crystal can reflect light, why any of this matters when it’s an intensely violent super-pokémon, and whether or not its design inspired certain rock bands of the 1970s to make absolutely fantastic album covers. While all of these are certainly good questions, the author would like to reassure his readers that he and his counterparts of Sinnoh and Kalos are very close to a breakthrough on that last one.