UB-05: Guzzlord

Guzzlord
The Junkivore Pokémon
Type: Dark/Dragon
Official Registration #: 799
Entry: One of the Ultra Beasts, or strange pokémon that had appeared from another dimension. According to witnesses, this pokémon eats everything in its path, from garbage on the ground to full-on buildings. In fact, guzzlord is constantly eating, stuffing its massive maw with its crab-like hands. However, despite how much it consumes, no one can identify its anus or, in fact, locate its droppings. However, considering what it eats, perhaps it’s better that we never find the inevitable horror that must be guzzlord poop.

It’s good to know that you make an effort to maintain a level of class on this blog, Bill. —LH

It could be worse. These entries could be written by Bebe. —Bill

Good point. —LH

UB-04: Celesteela and Kartana

Celesteela
The Launch Pokémon
Type: Steel/Flying
Official Registration #: 797
Entry: One of the Ultra Beasts, or strange pokémon that had appeared from another dimension. According to witness reports, celesteela possesses incredible firepower—literally. From the cannons that double as its “arms” (no pun intended there), celesteela can shoot blasts of gas so potent it can instantly set fire to an entire forest. This is unfortunate, considering the facts that celesteela is partly a steel-type, that its other type is not fire, and that forest fires can reach temperatures in excess of 1472 degrees Fahrenheit.

Kartana
The Drawn Sword Pokémon
Type: Grass/Steel
Official Registration #: 798
Entry: One of the Ultra Beasts, or strange pokémon that had appeared from another dimension. Despite its status as an Ultra Beast, kartana is not an aggressive pokémon at all. Rather, this small, origami-like pokémon lies still when in the presence of humans and avoids conflict at all times. However, its edges are razor-sharp and capable of slicing clean through steel, so humans should be warned: getting a paper cut from this pokémon is quite literally the worst fate imaginable.

Magearna

We interrupt our series on Ultra Beasts to give you a special entry in time for the holidays. On behalf of the Pokédex, happy holidays, whatever you celebrate!

Magearna
The Artificial Pokémon
Type: Steel/Fairy
Official Registration #: 801
Entry: This unique, doll-like pokémon was created over 500 years ago by a brilliant inventor as a gift to a young princess. It is both sentient and capable understanding human speech, and it possesses both true empathy and an artificial soul. In short, it is a wondrous gift that truly puts every other to shame.

Speaking of inventors who give unnecessarily complicated gifts to young girls, I checked your IP address, Bill, and aren’t you supposed to be celebrating the holidays with your little sister and the rest of your family in Goldenrod, as opposed to, you know, your teleporter and forlorn cottage in Cerulean? —LH

…. —Bill

[BILL has logged off.]

UB-03: Xurkitree

Xurkitree
The Glowing Pokémon
Type: Electric
Official Registration #: 796
Entry: One of the Ultra Beasts, or strange pokémon that had appeared from another dimension. According to witnesses, this pokémon is capable of discharging incredible amounts of electricity by connecting its plug-like tail into the earth and channeling and amplifying the planet’s natural electrical current. Interestingly enough, the bulbs and head of this pokémon also glow like Christmas tree ornaments as it undergoes this process. However, attempting to plug this pokémon into a domestic outlet and use it as a Christmas ornament tends to be ill-advised, less because this may destroy your home’s electrical grid (although, yes, it will do that too) but more because the plug head is only adaptable to outlets used in South Africa, so it’s a little pointless to even try.

UB-02: Buzzwole and Pheromosa

Buzzwole
The Swollen Pokémon
Type: Bug/Fighting
Official Registration #: 794
Entry: One of the Ultra Beasts, or strange pokémon that had appeared from another dimension. Gifted with an impressive physique, this mosquito-like pokémon has been sighted showing off its body by smashing cars in half with single punches and by flexing its muscles. Researchers are still not entirely certain whether these displays are meant to be a boast or a threat. However, having met highly athletic humans who enjoy showing off their muscles and tossing short, skinny, muscularly underdeveloped teenagers into dumpsters, the author is inclined to say boasts and threats are not mutually exclusive conditions.

Pheromosa
The Lissome Pokémon
Type: Bug/Fighting
Official Registration #: 795
Entry: One of the Ultra Beasts, or strange pokémon that had appeared from another dimension. This elegant, cockroach-like pokémon has been spotted running at incredible speeds across the land. However, it has not been seen touching anything but the ground, and it in fact refuses to do so. The reason why it refuses to touch anything is either because it senses some uncleanliness in the world that’s actually there or because it perceives the world to be unclean and is therefore fantastically judgmental and rude; the research community is currently debating which is more likely.

Could you talk about any of the ultra beasts

I could talk about all of them, anonymous, but I suppose the most appropriate place to start with the ultra beasts would be with the first one ever documented:

Nihilego
The Parasite Pokémon
Type: Rock/Poison
Official Registration #: 793
Entry: One of the Ultra Beasts, or strange pokémon that had appeared from another dimension. This jellyfish-like pokémon possesses strange and not well-understood powers, including the ability to teleport, open portals, and influence the human mind. Those who were exposed to this creature’s neurotoxins have reported erratic and often fervent or obsessive behavior, usually culminating in extraordinary feats for the sake of ripping apart the space-time continuum in the name of science and pokémon. Incidentally, the above-mentioned symptoms also describe the effects of hard liquor on the author, which also incidentally is a state that led to the creation of the Time Capsule, so if there are no objections, the author would like to propose an experiment involving himself, a nihilego, and a bottle of whiskey.

I have objections. I have a lot of objections to this plan. —LH

Solgaleo and Lunala

Solgaleo
The Sunne Pokémon
Type: Psychic/Steel
Official Registration #: 791
Entry: The evolved form of cosmoem, by battle experience. According to Alolan legend, this legendary beast came from another world and devoured the sun, then shone the sun’s light from its body before … departing to another world, apparently. Which would take the sun with it, yet not only does the sun still exist, but also, Alola is well-known as being an incredibly sunny region. Also, this pokémon, despite the fact that it radiates light and heat, is not a fire-type at all, and this world is often a fantastic, wonderful place where some things defy any sort of explanation whatsoever.

Lunala
The Moone Pokémon
Type: Psychic/Ghost
Official Registration #: 792
Entry: The evolved form of cosmoem, by battle experience. According to Alolan legend, this legendary beast came from another world and devoured the light of the moon. Which, if one thinks about it for any length of time, makes a little less sense than devouring the light of the sun, but honestly, the author has given up trying to make sense of legendary pokémon at this point.

What are different care methods for alolan vulpix compared to normal vulpix?

There are actually a lot of similarities, anonymous. As both are vulpine pokémon, both require the same diet (meat, if not kibble), the same spaces (outdoors to relieve themselves and wide-open areas to run about indoors), and even the same toys (canine chew toys, balls, and soft toys, depending on preference). Moreover, both forms of vulpix share requirements with growlithe, houndour, rockruff, and other dog-like cousins; the difference is that vulpix, being foxes, are a little bit harder to housebreak and leash train. They can be, of course, but it takes a bit more time and patience due to their wilder natures.

The differences between an Alolan and standard vulpix lie in their tolerances to water and heat.

For example, the standard vulpix is partially a fire-type, and like most fire-types, it’s uncomfortable when exposed to high volumes of water. While, like its aforementioned canine cousins, the standard vulpix can be trained to endure water and thus handle a bath, it much prefers to self-groom or have a dry bath consisting of sand and a thorough brushing from its trainer. Additionally, its fire typing means it prefers warmer environments and will often breathe small balls of flame to warm itself up. As such, a trainer needs to be wary of allowing it anywhere near anything flammable, and it’s recommended that they keep their home above 65 degrees Fahrenheit.

By contrast, the Alolan vulpix, being an ice-type, has no problems handling water at all and should be bathed regularly to maintain the cleanliness of its cloud-like tails. However, Alolan vulpix also grow heavily uncomfortable in the heat and thus should be kept cool at all times, even in the summer. If it’s too warm, it may create ice shards around itself to cool itself off, which provide an entirely different domestic hazard for an unwary trainer.

Also, keep in mind that the standard and Alolan vulpix have different types of coats due to the fact that they adapted to different types of environments. The standard vulpix is a short-haired variety that rarely sheds, but it’s very proud of the way its coat shines. It’s necessary, then, for a trainer to brush their vulpix daily to maintain both the smoothness and the shine of this coat; otherwise, the coat becomes dull and matted rather quickly, leading to an irritable vulpix.

Alolan vulpix, meanwhile, are less demanding in terms of personality and more demanding in terms of practicality. As mentioned above, Alolan vulpix have cloud-like tails and manes, which means it’s necessary to brush them to keep their thicker, curlier fur free of dirt and other debris. Additionally, although Alolan vulpix don’t fare well in warmer months, they still have both a summer coat and a winter coat and will shed their fur to cycle through both. It’s not unusual to wake up one autumn morning to find much of your home covered in fluffy, white clouds of fur quite literally everywhere, so invest in a good vacuum cleaner and an equally good pet pokémon brush.

Cosmog and Cosmoem

Cosmog
The Nebula Pokémon
Type: Psychic
Official Registration #: 789
Entry: This strange, nebula-like pokémon possesses a body made entirely of gas, and as such, it’s said to be physically frail. On the other hand, it also possesses incredible powers, such as the ability to open portals to strange and wondrous dimensions. It is either because of its composition or this ability to teleport that causes it to be highly difficult to capture, but either way, it is strongly recommended that you do not put it in a bag.

Cosmoem
The Protostar Pokémon
Type: Psychic
Official Registration #: 790
Entry: The evolved form of cosmog, by battle experience. After enduring incredible hardship, cosmog undergo the process of evolution, whereby its entire body mass becomes highly compressed. In truth, its nebulous body is really the very core of the black sphere at its center, while the rest of its appearance is really added matter that forms a solid cocoon. Consequently, the resulting cosmoem is extremely dense. Needless to say, it’s also not recommended that you put this pokémon in a bag, but in cosmoem’s case, it’s less because of its ability to escape (which it no longer has) and more because when the author says that this pokémon is extremely dense, he really means it weighs well over 2200 pounds.

Type: Null and Silvally

Type: Null
The Synthetic Pokémon
Type: Normal
Official Registration #: 772
Entry: According to files from Aether Foundation, this synthetic pokémon was created specifically to counter the power of the Ultra Beasts. It was forged from the DNA of several other species of pokémon, each of which was chosen for their incredible strength. However, because its creators feared that its power would render it difficult to control, it was forced to wear a restraint mask that greatly limited its true potential. Because no one in the history of this world has ever created the world’s most powerful pokémon and then forced it to wear power limiters, and this has never turned out to be a horrendous idea.

Silvally
The Synthetic Pokémon
Type: Normal
Official Registration #: 773
Entry: The evolved form of type: null, as a result of strengthened bonds with its trainer. It is, quite literally, a type: null that has managed to break off its limiting mask. The author is not quite sure what else to tell his readers there.