Does anyone ever call you Billbo Baggins? No really, I’m legitimately curious.

Some people did. I can’t imagine why.

The pun aside, it may have something to do with the fact that you were short and prone to running around the field barefoot during your undergraduate years. —LH

Of course I was short. I was twelve. And don’t tell me it wasn’t useful to go about barefoot. Pokémon never wear shoes! —Bill

…I’m going to pretend that statement really did make about as much sense as you think it did. —LH

Regarding your last post: I thought the name “Murkrow” was derived from “murky” and “crow”, not “murder” and “crow”. Murky as in dark, yeah.

Pokémon researchers are admittedly no strangers to the abuse of puns in their naming schemes, and frequently, a pokémon’s name will have not one but multiple etymological origins. “Murky” and “murder” are both listed as the possible origins for the “mur” part of “murkrow,” and to be quite honest, both are equally fitting for such a … fascinating specimen, to say the least.

Hey Bill, what’s the best scientific explanation for why having a Pokemon with Flame Body in the party reduces the incubation time of Pokemon Eggs?

Pokémon with Flame Body are essentially walking incubators. While actual portable incubators exist, pokémon are at least sentient and capable of maintaining and protecting eggs far better and more consistently than an incubator. Or to put it in other words, pokémon possess instincts that allow them to care for eggs by default, and with the amount of crossbreeding each species is capable of, specimens with Flame Body understand that every egg has a different set of needs, whereas humans only have a general idea of such (and incubators don’t typically have any idea of that at all). So when you allow a pokémon with Flame Body to care for an egg, they’re capable of cutting down on incubation time, simply because they not only know how to care for the egg instinctually (and thus know, for example, the type of bedding an egg requires, how to clean it, and so forth), but they also regulate their own body temperature to meet the egg’s needs.

It should be noted that while all pokémon know how to care for an egg, the reason why those with Flame Body are especially good at it is because not every pokémon is capable of emitting and controlling their levels of body heat with the same level of precision as a Flame Body pokémon. Even other fire-types are not quite as exact.

The same goes for pokémon with Magma Armor, surprisingly enough. Perhaps because of their understanding of the makeup of their body, pokémon with Magma Armor are also capable of caring for an egg by way of maintaining the constant, precise temperature needed to hatch it. However, unlike pokémon with Flame Body, Magma Armor specimens do not do so by regulating their own body temperature. Instead, they do so by realizing they perhaps should maintain a very specific distance from said egg.

So, Bill and Lanette… what’s that thing at the bottom right hand corner of this blog? And the three icon things next to the Internet Explorer icon at the bottom left hand corner? I feel like I should know this (I’m pretty sure I’ve used a computer with these icons), but I totally don’t.

From left to right, ignoring the start menu, the Internet Explorer icon, and the clock (all three of which you know), the other icons are as follows:

  1. Outlook
  2. Minimize all windows (i.e., display the desktop)
  3. View channels (This is a bit difficult to explain, but way back before everyone was constantly online thanks to the concept of not having your internet connection go through your phone line, the demand for content that could be viewed offline was high. To meet this, certain content providers—including notable television networks such as CeladonTV—created frequently updating web content that could be synced to a user’s computer and viewed at any time. These were called “channels” or “Active Channels,” and needless to say, they do not exist anymore.)
  4. Productivity tools

It should be noted that all of these are merely aesthetic. My actual desktop does not look like this. I just happen to like this operating system’s retro chic.
—Bill


Bill’s horrifying taste in design. That’s what those are. —LH