The Caterpie Line

Caterpie
The Worm Pokémon
Type: Bug
Official Registration #: 10
Entry: A small caterpillar pokémon with a voracious appetite for leaves. It spends considerable amounts of time preparing for evolution, usually by focusing on consuming large amounts of leaves. As such, it seems vulnerable and weak, but in actuality, it hides several techniques that it uses to protect itself during its hunt for more leaves. Namely, its antennae have the capability of releasing a strong, foul-smelling odor reminiscent of rotting cabbage. However, this is only one part of its defense mechanism. The rest of its defenses involve wrapping anything that comes close to it with String Shot and proceeding to Tackle until the aforementioned foul-smelling oils are rubbed all over the offending creature, which is then left in the sweltering Kantonian summer heat for hours on end as said offending creature struggles desperately to break free and get to a shower.

Metapod
The Cocoon Pokémon
Type: Bug
Official Registration #: 11
Entry: The evolved form of caterpie, by battle experience. A tenacious pokémon, metapod sits perfectly still as it waits for evolution. Its rock-hard shell is resilient on its own, but it uses its only move, Harden, to toughen its body even more in order to resist damage from predators. Even a pinsir’s spiked mandibles are no match for a metapod’s body. Incidentally, the fact that it will not move until evolution, as well as the facts that it is twenty-one pounds and a durable pokémon at that, make it the perfect pokémon to serve as a doorstop. Not that this writer has ever tried, of course.

Butterfree
The Butterfly Pokémon
Type: Bug/Flying
Official Registration #: 12
Entry: The evolved form of metapod, by battle experience. While the writer would normally talk at length about butterfree’s obsession with honey, the toxic dust that coats its wings, or the fact that much of its free time is spent either consuming vast amounts of honey or mating, in truth, this writer is more astounded by the fact that metapod—a pokémon incapable of independent battling, whose entire existence is devoted to avoiding any sort of movement whatsoever—can only evolve into butterfree by battling.

The Wurmple Line

Wurmple
The Worm Pokémon
Type: Bug
Official Registration #: 265
Entry: There is an easy way to tell if a wurmple will evolve into either a cascoon or a silcoon. What you’ll need to do is this: upon encountering a wurmple, grab it by the ridges on the back of its neck and [ERROR]

Silcoon
The Cocoon Pokémon
Type: Bug
Official Registration #: 266
Entry: The evolved form of wurmple, by a combination of battle experience and the individual’s personality. As a reflection of the wurmple’s own nature, silcoon are inherently graceful and beautiful and are known for both the softness and pure whiteness of their silk and the fact that they drink the dew off their own threads until evolution. In order to better understand silcoon and its close cousin the cascoon, imagine the most energetic morning person you have ever seen in your life. Have someone give them coffee and tell you that you are not, under any circumstances, permitted to punch them. This is the silcoon according to all cascoon.

Beautifly
The Butterfly Pokémon
Type: Bug/Flying
Official Registration #: 267
Entry: The evolved form of silcoon, by battle experience. True to the rule that the cuter a pokémon looks, the more likely it is that the pokémon in question possesses either a violent temper, the means to disembowel you, or both, beautifly are among the most beautiful and vicious bug-types in the pokémon kingdom. Its mouth is actually a coiled needle that can grow to be at least double its body size in length when straightened, and needless to say, it uses this needle to stab anyone who gets within reach of it as it feeds on flower nectar.

Cascoon
The Cocoon Pokémon
Type: Bug
Official Registration #: 268
Entry: The evolved form of wurmple, by a combination of battle experience and the individual’s personality. As a reflection of the wurmple’s own nature, cascoon are literal balls of hatred and rage, capable of remembering you, your face, and the fact that you hit it, looked at it strangely, or put it within two feet of a silcoon. It is highly advisable to apologize profusely to your cascoon on a constant basis to avoid being Psybeamed in the face immediately upon its evolution into dustox.

Dustox
The Poison Moth Pokémon
Type: Bug/Poison
Official Registration #: 269
Entry: The evolved form of cascoon, by battle experience. Despite its initial burst of rage, dustox settle into a more passive persona as they age. Rather than live solitary lifestyles and engage in aggressive, territorial behavior, dustox are more prone to congregating with their fellow dustox near sources of light, and they typically only attack when directly threatened. However, the main problem with dustox is that their scales are covered with an extremely toxic powder that happens to be released with every flap of their wings, which means they are also far, far more likely to inadvertently poison anyone who happens to be anywhere near them, much to the typical dustox’s dismay.

Anorith and Armaldo

Anorith
The Old Shrimp Pokémon
Type: Rock/Bug
Official Registration #: 347
Entry: This ancient, shrimp-like pokémon swam at the bottom of the shallow Hoennian seas, where it is said it hunted for prey using its sharp claws. This theory is not entirely correct. Yes, it hunted for prey, but its fearsome, quick-witted prey happened to be algae and the waste byproducts of its fellow marine pokémon. The only reason why the pokédex phrases anorith’s dietary habits the way it does is either because this writer’s colleagues have only so much space to summarize a pokémon’s entire behavior or because “it hunts for prey” is a far more elegant term than “it feeds on pokémon droppings.”

Armaldo
The Plate Pokémon
Type: Rock/Bug
Official Registration #: 348
Entry: The evolved form of anorith, by battle experience. Armaldo are an ancient pokémon equipped with armor that can deflect practically anything, foot-long claws capable of punching through steel, and a body consisting of 150 pounds of pure muscle and rock. It is, in other words, a pokémon entirely designed to make you regret ever having enjoyed shrimp.

The Weedle Line

Weedle
The Hairy Bug Pokémon
Type: Poison/Bug
Official Registration #: 13
Entry: Weedle uses its sensitive and prominent proboscis to locate and separate its favorite leaves to eat from its least favorite leaves. All weedle have very specific leaf preferences, as well as acute senses of smell in order to sort leaves on the forest floor based on these preferences. If anyone finds this at all strange or unusual, the writer would like to remind his audience that humanity’s own obsession with gardening has resulted in over 7500 different types of tomato, and if you use the wrong type for sauce, your sister who possesses far more culinary talents than you will ever have will ensure that you are painfully aware of what, precisely, each of those 7500 different varieties of tomato are for.

Kakuna
The Cocoon Pokémon
Type: Poison/Bug
Official Registration #: 14
Entry: The evolved form of weedle, by battle experience. In this stage of its evolutionary line, kakuna are strictly preparing for evolution and therefore remain nearly immobile. However, it is important to note that “nearly immobile” is not the same as “actually and completely immobile,” and should you accidentally stumble onto an entire tree covered with kakuna, said kakuna will extend their poison barbs through their shells in order to remind you of what that difference is.

Beedrill
The Poison Bee Pokémon
Type: Poison/Bug
Official Registration #: 15
Entry: The evolved form of kakuna, by battle experience. Quite obviously, training a weedle to its beedrill stage takes a lot of determination and audacity. This is not only because the kakuna stage is nearly immobile, therefore requiring a trainer to exert the patience needed to help their kakuna cultivate the experience required for evolution, but also because the resulting beedrill is a fiercely territorial and aggressive creature armed with three potently venomous stingers each measuring a foot long. Trainers who wish to keep beedrill are highly advised to keep healthy stocks of antidotes, pecha berries, and whatever they feel would be best to sedate a three-foot-tall bee that can fly at one’s face at violently high speeds.

Scyther and Scizor

Scyther
The Mantis Pokémon
Type: Bug/Flying
Official Registration #: 123
Entry: Contrary to popular belief, scyther are not inherently violent and easily enraged pokémon. They are, in actuality, extremely proud pokémon with a full range of emotions, including compassion. It just so happens that they have scythes for hands and the alien morality of an insectoid species, and these tend to get in the way of what human beings would define as “compassion.”

Scizor
The Pincer Pokémon
Type: Bug/Steel
Official Registration #: 212
Entry: The evolved form of scyther, via trading if the subject has had a metal coat applied to it. Upon evolution, scyther’s signature blades metamorphose into scizor’s pincers. One would think that an absence of a cutting edge along with the maturation induced by evolution would render scizor a safer pokémon to handle than its preevolved counterpart, but in actuality, it uses its pincers—now reinforced with a steel-like exoskeleton—to violently hammer anything into the ground, be it an enemy pokémon, a piece of machinery, or an innocently bystanding researcher who in no way provoked said scizor.