Klefki
The Key Ring Pokémon
Type: Steel/Fairy
Official Registration #: 707
Entry: This sentient key ring pokémon never lets go of any key it finds. It is thus valued among the people of its native Kalos as a means to keep important keys—such as those to safes, vaults, and one’s home—safe, but at the same time, it is also a fantastically dangerous pokémon around keys one would like to keep on their own person … such as those to the second motorbike one obtains from a specific rental company, following the destruction of the first one.
Tag: Fairy
The Flabébé Line
Flabébé
The Single Bloom Pokémon
Type: Fairy
Official Registration #: 699
Entry: Researchers are in conflict as to whether or not the flower that flabébé holds is part of its body. However, everyone is in agreement that flabébé draws magical energy from the flower it chooses, that this flower sometimes resembles wildflowers, that flabébé is very small and difficult to see, and that the horrific thing involving a lawnmower that you are likely thinking of is an unfortunate but regular occurrence in the region of Kalos.
Floette
The Single Bloom Pokémon
Type: Fairy
Official Registration #: 670
Entry: The evolved form of flabébé, by battle experience. This tiny pixie pokémon lives primarily in fields where wildflowers thrive, as it survives by drawing magical energy from the blossoms. However, it is possible to find it in gardens, particularly well-kept gardens, where it will dance among plants in celebration for flowers that have been taken care of with love. As a result, some gardeners encounter floette regularly, others may wait years before floette appear, and a handful, the author has been told, have waited for what feels like over 3000 years for one. The author is certain this is an exaggeration.
Florges
The Garden Pokémon
Type: Fairy
Official Registration #: 671
Entry: The evolved form of floette, by exposure to shiny stone. In ages past, lords, royalty, and other upperclass individuals would invite florges to live in their gardens, as a florges’ elegance was a much sought-after touch many upperclassmen wanted for their gardens. In exchange, the florges would have access to an abundance of flower energy. However, then the lawnmower was invented, and given the previous entry concerning flabébé, one can only draw conclusions as to why this is no longer practiced.
The Ralts Line
As an apology for our delay in both the response to the last question and our entries as a whole, please accept this special, extra entry for the day. Thank you for your patience. —LH
Ralts
The Feeling Pokémon
Type: Psychic/Fairy
Official Registration #: 280
Entry: A childlike pokémon native to the quieter forests of Hoenn. Because of its ability to sense the emotions of others, it typically avoids contact with anything that is not of the ralts line and is, therefore, extremely rare and difficult to find. However, because of its timidity, its soft but cute cry, and its eagerness to please others (in order to neutralize any negativity that surrounds it), it is also a popular pokémon among children and young adults … which very likely does absolutely nothing to alleviate ralts’s aversion to drama and high doses of extreme emotion.
Kirlia
The Emotion Pokémon
Type: Psychic/Fairy
Official Registration #: 281
Entry: The evolved form of ralts, by battle experience. Although kirlia possesses more mastery over its psychic abilities than its predecessor, it is still prone to being highly affected by the emotions of its trainer. For example, trainers who experience incredible emotions of joy or pride may cause their kirlia to dance with happiness. Trainers suffering through negative emotions will find that their kirlia has become lethargic and depressed. And trainers in the vicinity of other humans they find incredibly attractive will cause their kirlia to ███████
Really, Bill? Really? —LH
Gardevoir
The Embrace Pokémon
Type: Psychic/Fairy
Official Registration #: 282
Entry: The evolved form of kirlia, by battle experience. Only the strongest trainers who form the closest, most loving bonds with their kirlia may see their pokémon evolve to their final, natural forms. Thus, a gardevoir is born out of strong feelings of loyalty, so it stands to reason that gardevoir in general are inherently extremely protective of their trainers. This is true; all observable tamed gardevoir have been known to go to extreme lengths to protect their trainers from any potential threat. Unfortunately for most people, “extreme lengths” may include creating a miniature black hole, and “potential threat” may include literally anyone within five feet of their trainers.
Gallade
The Blade Pokémon
Type: Psychic/Fighting
Official Registration #: 475
Entry: The evolved form of male kirlia, by exposure to dawn stone. Although its sibling evolution results from the incredible bonds formed between a kirlia and another being, this does not mean gallade do not experience similarly intense urges to protect their trainers and loved ones. If anything, their ability to sense the emotions of potential foes, combined with the drive to battle inherent in all fighting-types and extreme fondness for using the swords hidden in their forearms, make them even more gung-ho about protecting the people and pokémon they value the most. Therefore, trainers should be extremely wary about teaching their gallade to attack only on command, rather than any time they sense danger. Well-meaning researchers who intend to give gallade to sisters with questionable tastes in men, however, are free to teach their pokémon whatever they wish.
They aren’t, but good try. —LH
Spritzee and Aromatisse
Spritzee
The Perfume Pokémon
Type: Fairy
Official Registration #: 682
Entry: A puff-like pokémon of the fairy type. Spritzee emit a fragrance that may have the capability of enrapturing all those who smell it. However, this fragrance can be altered by what it eats. A spritzee on a diet of flowers, citrus fruits, and so forth will of course emit a pleasant, irresistible aroma. A spritzee that feeds primarily on garbage and garlic, however…
Aromatisse
The Fragrance Pokémon
Type: Fairy
Official Registration #: 683
Entry: The evolved form of spritzee, via trading if the subject is holding a sachet. Aromatisse are known for their powerful fragrances, which they can adjust at will. In the vicinity of humans they don’t particularly like, they will emit clouds of odors reminiscent of a dead skuntank, a flatulent muk, and an angry vileplume combined.
Swirlix and Slurpuff
Swirlix
The Cotton Candy Pokémon
Type: Fairy
Official Registration #: 684
Entry: A puff-like pokémon of the fairy type. Because it constantly eats sweets, it exudes a sticky, sugary substance that thoroughly coats its cotton-like fur. Thus, it is best to keep your swirlix away from children and ants in the summertime, as a combination of all three things can and will result in tears. Furthermore, do not lick your swirlix … and do not ask the author why this needs to be said.
Slurpuff
The Meringue Pokémon
Type: Fairy
Official Registration #: 685
Entry: The evolved form of swirlix, via trading if the subject has had a whipped dream applied to it. A swirlix’s nose is hundreds of times more sensitive than a human’s and is capable of distinguishing even the faintest of scents. It uses this strong sense of smell to assist bakers in creating the best pastries with the freshest ingredients … and also to embarrass lactose intolerant customers who accidentally eat pastries they failed to realize were made with dairy.
Cottonee and Whimsicott
Cottonee
The Cotton Puff Pokémon
Type: Grass/Fairy
Official Registration #: 546
Entry: Cottonee are small, fairy-like pokémon covered in a thick layer of cotton puffs. These cotton puffs are essential to its defense mechanism, as when threatened, it will launch clouds of cotton at the threat in order to confound them as it gets away. This may seem like a weak defense, but never make the mistake of underestimating it unless you, too, have been buried under a mountain of cotton launched by a full flock of cottonee in the wet heat of an Unovan summer day. For those uninitiated, imagine being set on fire. Now imagine that you’ve been set on fire by a minimum of fifty pounds of solid flames that you must wade through in order to not be on fire. This is what a cottonee spray is like.
Whimsicott
The Windveiled Pokémon
Type: Grass/Fairy
Official Registration #: 547
Entry: The evolved form of cottonee, by exposure to sun stone. This adorable sheep-like pokémon may seem whimsical and innocently playful at first glance, but never take your eyes off one or catch one’s interest in the field. They have the ability to compress their bodies and wriggle into homes through even the slightest cracks, where they will proceed to rearrange the occupant’s possessions and leave cotton wherever it goes. As a related note, after extracting a whimsicott from your home, always do a thorough check of every possible nook and cranny of your living space for any stray cotton. Cotton, after all, has an uncomfortable habit of clogging toilets, choking air vents, and generally being highly flammable.
Hey Bill, can we get your very important scientific perspective on TOGEPIMET- that is, on the Togepi line?
Ah, yes, the togepi line. Quite a fascinating one, actually!
Togepi
The Spike Ball Pokémon
Type: Fairy
Official Registration #: 175
Entry: A foot-tall, egg-like pokémon that possesses very little in the way of offensive, defensive, or—for that matter—any battling abilities. In fact, it is said that shell of this egg-like pokémon stores joy and happiness and that this egg-like pokémon’s main ability is spreading peace and love wherever it goes. You are, in short, battling the most baby-like of all pokémon, and it would be most advisable to rethink your life decisions if you find yourself in this situation. You monster.
Togetic
The Happiness Pokémon
Type: Fairy/Flying
Official Registration #: 176
Entry: The evolved form of togepi, as a result of a heightened sense of happiness. True to its defined species, togetic is a small, bird-like creature best known for its ability to spread happiness and luck to kind-hearted people. Conversely, it grows depressed and lethargic when exposed to the arrogant, selfish, and immature for long periods of time. Thus, while togetic is traditionally considered to be a symbol of fortune and prosperity to the people of its native Johto, in more modern times, it has also become the symbol of people with questionable taste in men. Such as this writer’s older sister.
Togekiss
The Jubilee Pokémon
Type: Fairy/Flying
Official Registration #: 468
Entry: The evolved form of togetic, by exposure to shiny stone. A large, bird-like creature that flies from region to region on a pair of great, pure-white wings. It prefers to migrate to peaceful regions, to shower the people living there with blessings of prosperity and peace as a reward for their efforts to love and respect one another. However, if it crosses a war-torn country, it is known for spreading peace, happiness, and justice by delivering unto any authority figure it finds the most violent uses of Sweet Kiss and Fairy Wind observed in the pokémon kingdom. In short, this writer wholeheartedly approves of togekiss’s political platform and is more than ready to vote for togekiss in the next general election.
The Jigglypuff Line
Igglybuff
The Balloon Pokémon
Type: Normal/Fairy
Official Registration #: 174
Entry: Igglybuff are known for their soft, pliable bodies that have a tendency to bounce continuously if made to roll. At this point, the writer would like to note that the field of pokémonology is both a fascinating and strange place, and the experiments that are implied to have been undertaken in order to find this out about igglybuff should be evidence of that fact.
Jigglypuff
The Balloon Pokémon
Type: Normal/Fairy
Official Registration #: 39
Entry: The evolved form of igglybuff, as a result of a heightened sense of happiness. According to the latest update of the pokédex, a jigglypuff’s vocal cords allow it to adjust the wavelengths of its lullabies to generate the precise tunes that would make their opponents the drowsiest. This theory, of course, conveniently does not take into consideration the possibility of multiple targets. Although that seems like a minor issue for anyone who is not a researcher, this became a bit of a problem during the Hoennian Jigglypuff Population Explosion of 2014, wherein hundreds of trainers relying on the pokédex found themselves waking up in fields a day later with jigglypuff pictograms scrawled across their faces with whatever writing implements they happened to unfortunately be carrying at the time.
Wigglytuff
The Balloon Pokémon
Type: Normal/Fairy
Official Registration #: 40
Entry: The evolved form of jigglypuff, by exposure to moon stone. Wigglytuff is a three-foot-tall rabbit-like pokémon with pink, velvety fur; large, watery eyes; a rubbery body that it inflates when threatened; and a singing voice known for lulling even the most hardcore night owls to sleep. Interestingly enough, this list of traits has made wigglytuff a popular pokémon among at least twelve different subcultures on the internet. Not that this writer would know anything about those kinds of subcultures.
Bill, what do you have to say about the Mr. Mime family?
Ah, the mime family.
Mime Jr.
The Mime Pokémon
Type: Psychic/Fairy
Official Registration #: 439
Entry: As a defensive maneuver, mime jr. mimics the expressions and motions of its predators. The enemy pokémon is thus so taken aback by this display that it can’t help but to hesitate long enough for the mime jr. to get away. The effectiveness of this maneuver may be difficult for some people to understand, so for a better idea of how and why this works, one should spend any amount of time in the general vicinity of a person and their younger siblings.
Mr. Mime
The Barrier Pokémon
Type: Psychic/Fairy
Official Registration #: 122
Entry: The evolved form of mime jr., by battle experience if the specimen knows Mimic. Despite its name, the mr. mime species is actually capable of being both male and female. Although it is difficult for this writer to admit, the name came from a notoriously sexist period of pokémonology and is based entirely on the misconception that only male organisms were capable of being terrible enough to manipulate impressionable humans into believing an object exists when it doesn’t until it does. As it turns out, both sexes of mr. mime do this, and the pokémonology community spent the ensuing sixty years pretending that the name came from an unfortunate translation error.
Pikachu?
Plusle
The Cheering Pokémon
Type: Electric
Official Registration #: 311
Entry: Contrary to popular belief, not a long-eared pikachu. Its abilities are best used in tandem with minun; otherwise, you have a very cheerful rabbit with the electrical strength of a battery.
Minun
The Cheering Pokémon
Type: Electric
Official Registration #: 312
Entry: Contrary to popular belief, also not a long-eared pikachu. Its abilities are best used in tandem with plusle; otherwise, you have a very cheerful rabbit with the electrical strength of a battery.
Pachirisu
The EleSquirrel Pokémon
Type: Electric
Official Registration #: 417
Entry: Contrary to popular belief, not a long-tailed pikachu. Not to be underestimated. Although its electrical strength by no means rivals the aforementioned pikachu, its tenacity and energy render it intensely difficult to defeat in the hands of the right trainer. Which has made at least one tournament against a certain dragon trainer hilarious to watch. (On the negative side, this also makes pachirisu infestations difficult to control, which is, to be fair, not entirely an issue except for that one time when one noteworthy specimen was responsible for a major blackout in Castelia City.)
Emolga
The Sky Squirrel Pokémon
Type: Electric/Flying
Official Registration #: 587
Entry: Contrary to popular belief, not a flying pikachu. However, just as potentially destructive as one. Fortunately, as buildings provide inadequate surfaces from which to jump off and land, emolga generally prefer sticking to forested areas, as trees are far easier to glide between. Unfortunately, this is of no comfort to anyone who happens to be traveling through the wooded areas of Unova—which is to say, everyone.
Dedenne
The Antenna Pokémon
Type: Electric/Fairy
Official Registration #: 702
Entry: Actually, this one probably is a close relative to pikachu. We’re still doing research into that.
The Pokédex According to Bill 