Tag: Fighting

Oranguru and Passimian

Oranguru
The Sage Pokémon
Type: Normal/Psychic
Official Registration #: 765
Entry: These orangutan-like pokémon are of particular interest to pokémon ethologists and paleontologists. This is largely because of its notably human-like behavior. While it often spends its time separated from pokémon and engaging in self-education through meditation, it will sometimes venture down from its home to feed and care for wild pokémon as part of what is apparently a human-like moral obligation. More importantly, oranguru also possess the ability to create and use tools as well as command other pokémon in battles against human trainers. Captive oranguru have even shown the capability of using poké balls, which all in all means that a pokémon uprising is a very real possibility for our future, but the author, for one, would welcome our oranguru overlords.

Passimian
The Teamwork Pokémon
Type: Fighting
Official Registration #: 766
Entry: These lemur-like pokémon are of particular interest to pokémon ethologists and paleontologists. For one, scientists have noted that passimian form primitive colonies that very much resemble those of humankind’s own primate cousins and thus, in much the same way, may help pokémonologists understand the origins of the more humanlike pokémon, such as sawk and throh. Second, passimian have been known to make their own tools (namely, the polished coconuts they’re often seen carrying) with an almost humanlike intelligence and level of care, thus intriguing pokémon ethologists on the subject of pokémon sapience. Third, very little else is known about the passimian, as they have a tendency to congregate in groups of ten to thirty specimens, each armed with a polished coconut, to swarm and attack pokémon paleo-ethologists … such as the author.

Crabrawler and Crabominable

Crabrawler
The Boxing Pokémon
Type: Fighting
Official Registration #: 739
Entry: Confusingly enough, although this coconut crab-like pokémon resembles krabby and corphish on a superficial level, it’s actually a fighting-type, not a water-type. While most researchers will tell you that it’s because its elemental weakness and resistance distribution resembles that of a pure fighting-type and not of a water or even water/fighting pokémon, seasoned pokémon ethologists will also offer the observation that crabrawler resembles a fighting-type in terms of behavior, including its technique of defending itself fiercely with its boxing glove-like claws, its willingness to train its physical traits by punching trees, and its zest for fighting literally anything and everything that crosses its path.

Crabominable
The Woolly Crab Pokémon
Type: Fighting/Ice
Official Registration #: 740
Entry: The evolved form of crabrawler, by battle experience, when trained in an exceptionally cold environment. The exact circumstances of this pokémon’s evolution have not only resulted in a significant boost in power but also in temper. Consequently, it will lash out at anything within reach, even going so far as to use its own claws as projectiles. To be fair, from what this author has observed, it’s not entirely unusual for someone native to a tropical island to respond to extreme cold with extreme anger.

I’m not so sure someone who doesn’t have much of a tolerance for heat should be commenting on someone else’s tolerance for cold. —LH

What? I can tolerate heat just fine. —Bill

You once described Fallarbor Town as “a nice little hamlet nestled on the slopes of Mount Doom.” —LH

Well, it is. —Bill

Stufful and Bewear

Stufful
The Flailing Pokémon
Type: Normal/Fighting
Official Registration #: 759
Entry: Although this pokémon strongly resembles a stuffed animal, humans should take caution in its presence. Even the smallest, youngest stufful is capable of knocking a pro wrestler flat on his back. This may sound like a rather specific comparison, but luckily, the research community actually has a handy subject for verification. Unfortunately, the author is not at liberty to say who, but let’s just say he’s in a prime position to study Alolan pokémon, and his wife has asked us all to humor him.

Bewear
The Strong Arm Pokémon
Type: Normal/Fighting
Official Registration #: 760
Entry: The evolved form of stufful, by battle experience. This red panda-like pokémon is famous for its unusual behavior, which is commonly studied by pokémon ethologists. While most pokémon smile and approach to interact with humans in a friendly manner, smiling, waving, and approaching are all signs of aggression in bewear. Signs of happiness, meanwhile, are often displayed in the form of curling up on the ground and crying, as these are the most prone and vulnerable positions for bewear to take. However, humans should take caution: just because a bewear is prone doesn’t necessarily mean it’s open for approach, and it can go from crying to breaking a human’s arm with a smile in a matter of seconds.

Makuhita and Hariyama

Makuhita
The Guts Pokémon
Type: Fighting
Official Registration #: 296
Entry: While it’s true that Symposium makes an effort to choose designations that fit their respective pokémon, makuhita’s designation is especially apt due to its bravery and tenacity. No matter what is thrown at a makuhita, it either endures it or gets back up shortly afterwards. Some even throw themselves right back into the fray in the exact same way that had gotten them knocked down in the first place.

Bill, I swear to both of our pantheons that if you reference yet another somewhat popular 90s pop song that only a fraction of our readers remember… —LH

Well, I wasn’t going to, but if you’re going to tempt me, okay. —Bill

Makuhita gets knocked down, but it gets back up again. You aren’t ever going to keep it down. It does not, however, piss the night away, as alcohol is generally toxic to pokémon.

Hariyama
The Arm Thrust Pokémon
Type: Fighting
Official Registration #: 297
Entry: The evolved form of makuhita, by battle experience. Incidentally, yes, high fives with this pokémon end just about as well as one would think they would.

Shroomish and Breloom

Shroomish
The Mushroom Pokémon
Type: Grass
Official Registration #: 285
Entry: Contrary to popular belief, this mushroom-like pokémon is not hallucinogenic. You cannot, as the urban legend claims, snort its powdery spores in order to experience transcendental visions. Rather, its spores are actually toxic and will simply cause paralysis and full-body pain when inhaled. Also contrary to popular belief, the author does not know this from experience; he simply went to college with several gullible gentlemen and a girl who had a shroomish and a strong dislike for college first-years who would hit on her then-fifteen-year-old sister.

Breloom
The Mushroom Pokémon
Type: Grass/Fighting
Official Registration #: 286
Entry: The evolved form of shroomish, by battle experience. It’s never easy to figure out whether one should be more wary of the front end of the back end of a breloom. On the one hand (no pun intended), breloom are famous for their lightning-fast punches and kicks, facilitated by the elasticity of their claw-tipped limbs. On the other, they also possess hollow rattles on their tails—seeds containing highly toxic spores capable of inducing horrendous stomach aches when ingested. Should anyone wonder exactly how the dangers of ingesting breloom seeds are relevant to its battling style, please note that breloom can learn no fewer than four different seed-based attacks, two of which come naturally. And yes, this is something the author knows from first-hand experience.

UB-02: Buzzwole and Pheromosa

Buzzwole
The Swollen Pokémon
Type: Bug/Fighting
Official Registration #: 794
Entry: One of the Ultra Beasts, or strange pokémon that had appeared from another dimension. Gifted with an impressive physique, this mosquito-like pokémon has been sighted showing off its body by smashing cars in half with single punches and by flexing its muscles. Researchers are still not entirely certain whether these displays are meant to be a boast or a threat. However, having met highly athletic humans who enjoy showing off their muscles and tossing short, skinny, muscularly underdeveloped teenagers into dumpsters, the author is inclined to say boasts and threats are not mutually exclusive conditions.

Pheromosa
The Lissome Pokémon
Type: Bug/Fighting
Official Registration #: 795
Entry: One of the Ultra Beasts, or strange pokémon that had appeared from another dimension. This elegant, cockroach-like pokémon has been spotted running at incredible speeds across the land. However, it has not been seen touching anything but the ground, and it in fact refuses to do so. The reason why it refuses to touch anything is either because it senses some uncleanliness in the world that’s actually there or because it perceives the world to be unclean and is therefore fantastically judgmental and rude; the research community is currently debating which is more likely.

The Jangmo-o Line

Jangmo-o
The Scaly Pokémon
Type: Dragon
Official Registration #: 782
Entry: A small, dragon-like pokémon native to the rocky canyons of Alola’s Poni Island. Although they look fierce, jangmo-o are actually highly timid pokémon around anything but other jangmo-o. As a result, they reside deep within Poni Islands’ cave and canyon system, in rugged terrain that’s very difficult for most humans and pokémon to traverse. There, they train against each other, bashing into one another with their rock-hard crests in order to harden their hides into steel-like armor … which of course is perhaps not the most advantageous thing they could do to preserve their reclusive lifestyle, seeing as the sound of one jangmo-o bashing itself against another jangmo-o produces a loud clang that resonates throughout their native cave system and thus alerts any possible outsider to their nests’ specific locations, but who is the author to judge?

Hakamo-o
The Scaly Pokémon
Type: Dragon/Fighting
Official Registration #: 783
Entry: The evolved form of jangmo-o, by battle experience. As this pokémon grows, it sheds its scales. Through this process, each hakamo-o develops a coat of scales that grows harder and sharper with each subsequent shedding. On a hakamo-o, these scales are invaluable and become integrated in their owner’s vicious, physical techniques. Their sharp edges can serve as weapons in a pinch and can inflict lacerations upon the slightest touch, especially as hakamo-o grows older or nears evolution. Off of a hakamo-o, however, they’re either great for slicing vegetables or a fantastically easy way to earn yourself a visit to one of Alola’s many lovely emergency medical facilities, depending on whether or not you were able to spot these shed scales before stepping on them.

Kommo-o
The Scaly Pokémon
Type: Dragon/Fighting
Official Registration #: 784
Entry: The evolved form of Hakamo-o, by battle experience. In order to intimidate any enemy it spots, kommo-o vigorously jingles the metallic scales on its tail. The author assures you that when facing a five-foot tall, 173-pound dragon that can either maul you with its claws, throw you, or slice you in half with the aforementioned tail, this jingling is a lot more intimidating than it sounds.

Heracross

Heracross
The Single Horn Pokémon
Type: Bug/Fighting
Official Registration #: 214
Entry: A massive, beetle-like pokémon first discovered in the Johto region. Known for its massive horn, heracross are capable of valiantly defending their territories and beloved honey trees by slipping said horn beneath an enemy and flinging them away. However, despite this habit, heracross are normally docile pokémon; it’s only when eating honey—its favored food—that a trainer should beware of being attacked. Interestingly enough, despite its absolute love for honey, it is not a good idea to offer it some in an attempt to establish a rapport with it. Rather, this is an excellent way to guarantee that the heracross you’re attempting to befriend will slam its horn into your stomach, lift you up, and throw you directly into a tree before taking the entire pot of honey for itself.

Croagunk and Toxicroak

Croagunk
The Toxic Mouth Pokémon
Type: Poison/Fighting
Official Registration #: 453
Entry: This frog-like pokémon may be recognizable to sports fans, as it’s highly popular as a mascot for various teams. Of course, this is perfect, as the author can think of no pokémon more appropriate to serve as a representation for good sportsmanship than one known for fighting dirty and stabbing opponents with its strong, poison-tipped fingers whenever they least expect it.

Toxicroak
The Toxic Mouth Pokémon
Type: Poison/Fighting
Official Registration #: 454
Entry: The evolved form of croagunk, by battle experience. Many parts of toxicroak’s body are actually highly dangerous and are either containers for or coated with an extremely potent venom. Its claws, for example, are tipped with a venom that can kill an adult human being with the lightest scratch, its skin can induce paralysis seconds after contact, and its mouth—for which its species was named—is capable of spewing toxic gas and sludge. In fact, toxicroak’s distinctive croaking is actually part of its battle tactics by serving it two advantages. First, the act of croaking vibrates the poison sac on its throat and shakes the venom inside to increase its potency. Second, as noted earlier, toxicroak’s croak is highly distinctive and recognizable, so the croak itself brings toxicroak’s attention onto individuals who may be ideal choices of prey … by chasing away anything intelligent enough to fight back.