I’m sorry you’re getting another ultra beast question but this is just about speculation. Why do you think the ones we know about share the ability Beast Boost? Is it possibly something to do with them being out of their own world?

This is a fascinating and excellent question, actually! We know so little about the Ultra Beasts that there’s no one theory that’s more accepted in the scientific community than others, but I have my own. Namely, I think it has less to do with the affects our world has on them and more to do with their specific physiologies. It’s possible that they’re all related in some way—perhaps they’re even actually iterations of the same species, just from alternate dimension. Think of it like you and a you from an alternate timeline.

On that note, I find it quite interesting that they’re all the dominant species of their respective worlds, except for poipole (whose world we came to) and guzzlord (who appeared in an alternate version of our world). If the stories I’ve heard about them are true, anyway.

I’ve heard that some scientists think that Guzzlord’s mouth acts as either a black hole or interdimensional portal. I dont think rope or cable would work well with either.

Okay, but what if I used a particularly strong cable?

Then you would likely violate some law of physics. Furthermore, you are still barred from testing that theory. —LH

What if we don’t find Guzzlord poop because it eats it like everything else?

That’s certainly a possibility, but it begs the question of what happens to the materials that supposedly aren’t digestible by any living organism. After all, some common manmade materials can’t even be digested by swalot, and swalot have possibly the most potent digestive juices in existence.

…

…actually, with a long and durable enough cable, perhaps I could [REDACTED]

No, Bill, you are not going to be conducting any such experiment. Honestly, how many times do I have to tell you that if it’s a fetish on the internet, you’re not allowed to do it for science?! —LH

You let me wear costumes. —Bill

That’s not a precedent! —LH

UB-05: Guzzlord

Guzzlord
The Junkivore Pokémon
Type: Dark/Dragon
Official Registration #: 799
Entry: One of the Ultra Beasts, or strange pokémon that had appeared from another dimension. According to witnesses, this pokémon eats everything in its path, from garbage on the ground to full-on buildings. In fact, guzzlord is constantly eating, stuffing its massive maw with its crab-like hands. However, despite how much it consumes, no one can identify its anus or, in fact, locate its droppings. However, considering what it eats, perhaps it’s better that we never find the inevitable horror that must be guzzlord poop.

It’s good to know that you make an effort to maintain a level of class on this blog, Bill. —LH

It could be worse. These entries could be written by Bebe. —Bill

Good point. —LH