Why do people keep asking you to name things when it’s been well-established that you’re terrible at that? —LH
Excuse you, but “Sea Cottage” is a perfectly acceptable name for a cottage by the sea! —Bill
That depends, @the-firebrand. Is this a metal band or a boyband?
Not that it would matter much, of course, as I’d like to propose that you call them the Hypno. Maybe misspell it somehow—that worked for pop bands in the 60s, anyway.
Below is the actual video call between the author and editor regarding this ask, as transcribed and posted by the editor’s sister, Brigette Hamilton.
BILL
This is a rather silly question.
LH
Indeed it is. I don’t think it’s worth our attention.
BILL
I agree. After all, there are so many variables involved here.
LH
That’s not why—
BILL
I mean, I admit I don’t know the mass of a trillion pyroar off the top of my head, but I’d imagine it’s not nearly enough to take out the sun by default.
LH
Honestly, Bill, there are far more important things to worry about than—
BILL
On the other hand, pyroar are fire-types and therefore have a resistance to the element, and perhaps a trillion pyroar can form a miniature star-like object that collapses into an equally miniature black hole. That might compensate for the insufficient mass of a group of pyroar otherwise.
LH
Bill, that doesn’t—
BILL
Come to think of it, hold on. Let’s think about this for a second. How much does each pyroar weigh? Should we just assume they’re all perfectly average weight? Also, would the nuclear fusion take place on the planet or off? We’ll need to add in the mass of each pyroar’s breathing apparatus if that’s the case. Now that I think about it, we should probably assume the fusion takes place off-planet, perhaps in the corona at the very closest. We can’t have the pyroar die before the battle begins; otherwise, the whole point is moot. What configuration are the pyroar in as they fly towards the sun? Is it a cube of pyroar, a sphere, or an amorphous cloud?
LH
Why are you like this?
Wait, Brigette posted this? Just how many people did you give my login credentials to, Lanette? —Bill
All of us. —Bebe
hey bill whats up? —Molayne
If you’re referring to the fact that many of them are a bit “pointy,” there are two possible reasons for this.
The first and more scientific reason has to do with Kanto’s terrain and climate. Kanto is a region largely free of natural hazards such as the mountains of Johto, the deserts and volcanoes of Hoenn, the extreme cold of Sinnoh, and the barren wasteland of Unova. (I will stop commenting on Unova when it stops being amusing. Or true.) Instead, Kanto has mild seasons, shorter mountains to the north, lush but not necessarily unnavigable forests, and plenty of fertile land. In short, Kanto’s biomes aren’t exactly extreme, and even though there is some variation (grasslands versus forest versus coast, namely), the transition between them isn’t as abrupt as it is in other regions. Thus, most pokémon adapt to very similar environments and very similar climates, which results in a certain uniformity to the specific adaptations they take on.
Additionally, as for why many of them have similar defense mechanisms (lapras, nidoran, rhyhorn, and so forth are all covered with horns and spikes), it’s essentially because the only real threat most Kantonian pokémon face are other Kantonian pokémon. That abundance of horns, thorns, and other things that discourage physical contact are really the best defense mechanisms against an entire region of pokémon who aim to battle one another, rather than against any specific environmental hazard. This is also why the vast majority of grass-types in the region are also highly poisonous, can exude poison, or are essentially walking balls of things that can choke a kangaskhan.
Alternatively, the second and less scientific explanation is that they’re all descended from Mew, so they’re all basically siblings.
It really depends on whom you ask: the religious sects of Kanto or Kantonian scientists.
the-firebrand replied to your post “So Toxicroak sounds dangerous to even be around, how is it that people…”
Pfft, everyone knows Charizard don’t torch their trainers because they don’t have the stones to question authority
At the risk of being unprofessional, I would love to see you say that after you’ve trained one, @the-firebrand.
Oh yes, I quite agree; training is a necessary step in unlocking a pokémon’s full potential. It’s simply that I lack any and all aptitude with it, so while I understand it on an academic level and can speak at length about its effects on pokémon, I am less inclined to engage in training-based research.
Largely because I would be annihilated within three seconds of stepping on the field.
Especially if my opponent was Candela.
As a native Johtonian and the son of a kimono girl at that, my thoughts on the Ransei period of our history are … complicated at best. On the one hand, Nobunaga unified the seventeen kingdoms and established the basis for the modern regional boundaries within Kanto, Johto, Sinnoh, Hoenn, and the outlying regions of Japan. On the other, doing so also ushered in a century of war that was only stopped by the burning of the Brass Tower and the departure of Ho-oh. Never mind, of course, his notoriously extreme methods to achieve military success. (It was not unusual for him to desecrate shrines to Ho-oh itself, for example, and this is not something one would ever want to do if they valued their souls.)
Then again, given the fact that the regions of Johto and Kanto both had the unfortunate tendency to erupt into bloody wars every hundred years or so up until that point, Nobunaga wasn’t entirely the worst thing that had ever happened to us. Not only that, but I don’t deny that it was an important part of our history, as well as an important stepping stone towards the interregional harmony our country experiences now.
Well. I admit I’m not entirely certain how best to advise you here, as “acting up” for a wobbuffet can mean a wide variety of things, ranging from its usual lethargy to mating season. Does your wobbuffet sway back and forth and emit cries that sound eerily like Tom Jones’s “It’s Not Unusual”? If not, then at the very least, we can rule out mating season. Otherwise:
Wynaut
The Bright Pokémon
Type: Psychic
Official Registration #: 360
Entry: A small, doll-like pokémon best known for three things: its constant smile, its habit of pushing up against solid objects and other wynaut in order to build strength, and its adoration of sweet fruit. The term “bright” pokémon is additionally a bit misleading. To put it in brief, the other thing wynaut is known for is its cry; to people of certain languages, it sounds like a phrase that can be translated into, “Really?”—which in turn has been interpreted as the concept of questioning and meditating on all that is. That, combined with its perpetual smile, its penchant for expressing “affection,” and all the other aforementioned traits, have led certain cultures to view this pokémon as a philosophical ideal—and thus, the incarnation of a vastly sage guru. In truth, wynaut are not particularly bright pokémon at all. Rather, because of their love for sweet fruits, they have a tendency to consume vast quantities of overripe and fermenting berries, and thus, their serene, sage-like behavior is better attributed to a state of perpetual drunkenness.
Wobbuffet
The Patient Pokémon
Type: Psychic
Official Registration #: 202
Entry: The evolved form of wynaut, via battle experience. The blue portion of wobbuffet’s body, while containing a brain and several vital organs, is actually mostly hollow, balloon-like, and highly resistant to damage. (It is, in fact, quite true that the brain of a wobbuffet is actually located in its nerve-packed tail.) Wobbuffet use this to their advantage, as their entire battle strategy involves inflating their blue, balloon-like bodies, taking hits, and retaliating with psi blasts equal to double the amount of damage they endure. As wobbuffet are docile and will refuse to attack unless their opponent attacks first and as wobbuffet’s primary ability prevents them from leaving a battle once it begins, two wobbuffet facing off against one another will tenaciously stand and wait until their opponent passes out from starvation. It is for this reason that trainers who keep wobbuffet should be warned that intentionally attempting to battle another trainer’s wobbuffet is an easy and fantastic way to lose your trainer’s license.
The Pokédex According to Bill 